I had some idea what to expect going from one to two living children. Thanks to Madison, I knew my capacity to love would grow with each additional baby we welcomed to our family. I had seen enough friends add to their families to know that there would be a learning curve and we have certainly learned a lot so far in these last 5 weeks! Things like….
Having a newborn is WAY too much fun. It may be because it has been 4 1/2 years since we have done this or because we had to say goodbye to Madison before we got to experience these things, but I am like a first time mom all over again with Barrett. I am fascinated with every sleepy smile and every sweet baby noise.
It is really hard to handle being needed by two kids at the same time. There is literally nothing that feels good about having one child wait while another gets what they need. I thought being able to explain the why to Reeves would help, but it really doesn’t help either of us. I have lost count of the number of times I have been asked to play or make a sandwich over the last month and had to ask him to wait because I was nursing or changing a diaper. That part stinks.
This time around, I am a whole lot more laid back. I think the same can be said for any Mom who has made the move up from one child, but I am just not as worried about the little things this time around. I have learned the things that require a healthy level of panic and those that we can just let go. Letting go feels pretty good.
The thing I crave most at the end of the day is silence. For someone who is largely introverted and really enjoys the quiet, this has been my biggest struggle. It doesn’t take much for things to escalate when you combine a baby crying with a four year old trying to ask a question, me yelling out an answer with a dog or two barking.
I still have a killer ability to do things with one hand. It took a few days to get it back, but I continue to surprise myself with the things I can do while holding a baby. Everything from brushing my teeth to typing an email (or blog post!).
I miss talking to my husband. There is a 1:1 ratio now and that has mostly looked like Barrett and I and Reeves and Jeff. It works, but it doesn’t allow a lot of time for us for small talk about anything that doesn’t involve the kids, the dogs or something else considered breaking news. Half the time when we do have the chance to talk, I spend the majority of the time trying to remember what I wanted to talk to him about!
With Barrett time is going by much faster. With Reeves, looking back I can see that it flew by but at the time it did not feel that way. With Barrett, I am shocked that 5 weeks have already gone by. I am sad that he is already starting to outgrow his newborn clothes. I want to hit the pause button so I can soak up every second.
Most of all, I would not trade a single moment of it.